When a Parent Has Dementia

It has a name now. Maybe you suspected it for a year, or maybe a hospital said it in one sentence on a Tuesday afternoon. Somewhere in the weeks that follow, between appointments and phone calls, there is a short list of things that are far easier this month than they will be next year. This page is that list.

A diagnosis is not the same as losing capacity

Capacity is a legal determination tied to a specific decision made on a specific day, it is not a medical diagnosis. A parent may repeat the same story and need help balancing the checkbook, and still retain legal capacity. Another parent may present as warm and well-groomed, and yet no longer have it. Once capacity is lost, the only remaining path is guardianship court: a proceeding that is public, requires an examining committee, and imposes annual reporting obligations paid for out of the parent's own funds.

What to sign while the window is open

• Durable power of attorney (Fla. Stat. 709.2105). Their signature, two witnesses, a notary, effective the day it is signed. The powers that matter most in a crisis, including making gifts and changing beneficiary designations, exist only if your parent initials next to each one (Fla. Stat. 709.2202).
• Health care surrogate designation (Fla. Stat. 765.202). Two adult witnesses, no notary. Your parent can authorize the surrogate to receive records and decide right away, without waiting for a physician to find incapacity. Name an alternate.
• Living will (Fla. Stat. 765.302). Their own instructions about life prolonging treatment, so no one has to decide for them in a hallway.
• Preneed guardian designation (Fla. Stat. 744.3045). Deposited with the clerk of the court, it tells a judge whom your parent wants in charge if guardianship ever becomes necessary, if other documents are challenged or deemed insufficient.

Review the will, the deed, and every beneficiary designation in the same appointment. Our power of attorney guide explains each requirement in detail.

If nothing was signed

For medical decisions, Florida falls back to a proxy list in fixed order: a court appointed guardian, then the spouse, then adult children, then parents, then adult siblings (Fla. Stat. 765.401). It works until the family disagrees, and then it does not. For money there is no fallback at all. No one can sell the car, reach the pension, or sign a care contract.

What remains is a petition to determine incapacity (Fla. Stat. 744.3201). The court appoints an attorney for your parent and a three member examining committee, one of them a psychiatrist or other physician, and incapacity must be proven by clear and convincing evidence (Fla. Stat. 744.331). Rights come off: some pass to a guardian, some are removed and never delegated, including voting and driving (Fla. Stat. 744.3215). Then it repeats every year with a plan and an accounting (Fla. Stat. 744.367). The examining committee, both attorneys, and the guardian are paid from your parent's own property (Fla. Stat. 744.108). For Orange and Osceola families this is the Ninth Judicial Circuit, and the file is public.

When guardianship is the right answer

A Florida judge has to look for something gentler first and may not appoint a guardian if a less restrictive alternative sufficiently addresses the problem (Fla. Stat. 744.331). Sometimes there is no alternative, and that is not a failure:

• Capacity is already gone and no power of attorney or health care surrogate exists
• Someone is exploiting your parent, and court supervision is the protection
• The agent is the problem: misusing funds, refusing to account, shutting out siblings
• A true emergency, where a judge may appoint an emergency temporary guardian for up to ninety days (Fla. Stat. 744.3031)

The Medicaid clock starts now

Florida pays for skilled nursing care through the Institutional Care Program, and for care at home or in assisted living through the statewide long term care waiver. Both require a CARES level of care determination. As of August 2026, countable assets must be at or below $2,000 and gross monthly income at or below $2,982, with a Qualified Income Trust as the fix when income runs higher, and the spouse who stays home keeps up to $162,660. Florida resets these each January, April, and July.

The rule to respect today is the look back. Florida reviews the 60 months before an application, and a transfer for less than fair value creates a penalty found by dividing what was given away by $10,645, the 2026 divisor. So do not add a child to the deed, do not move accounts into a child's name, and do not start gifting to spend down. Ask first. Our Medicaid look back guide covers what Florida allows, including the caregiver child exception.

Safety, and the conversation about driving

Driving is usually the first fight and the most dangerous one to lose. In Florida, any physician or any person who knows of a driver's medical condition may report it to the Department of Highway Safety and Motor Vehicles, which can call the driver in for reexamination. The report is confidential, and the law protects whoever makes it from civil and criminal liability (Fla. Stat. 322.126). A physician is often the better messenger than an adult child.

Plan for wandering before it happens. Florida's Silver Alert can be activated by law enforcement for a missing person 60 or older with irreversible cognitive deterioration when there is vehicle information to broadcast, so keep a current photograph and the license plate number where anyone can find them. Keep the Elder Helpline number, 1-800-963-5337, on the refrigerator too. It routes you to respite care and memory disorder clinics through Florida's Alzheimer's Disease Initiative, and respite is what keeps a caregiver standing.

Brothers and sisters

Dementia does not divide work evenly. One of you will carry most of it, usually whoever lives closest, and the others will hear a calmer version of every hard day. Name one agent and one successor instead of co-agents, then protect that person: a standing monthly update, a shared folder for statements, and a rule that whoever holds the power of attorney keeps receipts. Most sibling guardianship fights we see began as a bookkeeping question no one answered.

The first sixty days

• Book the legal appointment now, and bring your parent, because they are the one who signs
• Gather any existing documents and check the date and the state on each
• Ask the physician to document the diagnosis, the date, and the stage
• Ask for a referral to a memory disorder clinic
• List every account, policy, deed, and beneficiary designation
• Collect five years of financial statements while they are still easy to find
• Hold off on gifting or retitling anything until you have legal advice
• Simplify: consolidate accounts, turn on alerts, put bills on automatic payment
• Address driving honestly, with the physician's help
• Call the Elder Helpline, 1-800-963-5337, and ask what respite your family qualifies for
• Agree on one point of contact and one monthly update to the whole family

Related reading: our power of attorney guide, our Medicaid look back guide, and our Florida estate planning checklist.